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vandrende stjerne actually, i don't think i actually know how to ask for help. i know how to demand things of people, and i know how to beg. it's pathetic really...it's like in 28 days, where sandra bullock's character has to wear the sign that says confront me if i don't ask for help. i feel so incredibly useless at the moment. (hey, at least it's not numb anymore, right?) first off, i had to get meaghan to help me edit this morning. that sucked, and i know that i am not cut out for any sort of career in video arts or anything. i eventually did get the hang of it, and then editing went rather well. i finished my music video in 4 blocks, which is good, considering it was due last friday. then, after school, i went to tell meaghan that i did indeed finish my video. and then was confronted by ms wall (thank god for this. really, if this hadn't happened who knows where i would be now) about what was going on with my crew. nothing, because i have no fucking clue what i'm doing, so i haven't done anything. which would be my basic approach to life...if i don't already know how to do it, and can't find out without asking someone, it just won't get done. so i actually admitted that i hate the fact that i'm head of costume crew and don't know what i'm doing. so now, jessie is going to be forced to help me because she's ASM. then i had to go to the theatre and get measurements from all the actors. i went upstairs and borrowed a tape measure from sewing and then left the responsibility of measurements with kritin, and then came home. i realized that i said i was going to call a crew meeting tomorrow morning, and that i had to call my crew members and tell them. i don't use the phone. it doesn't happen. there are very few people that i will call willingly, and even then, it's hard. so i put it off...and then whined about it. and then finally asked hil to do it for me. which she did, because she's the most wonderful person ever. (and not only because she made my phone calls for me) so today is just val is a loser day. (sorry. i know i'm not supposed to say that. but in this case, it's actually true.) yay for being a loser. i'm going to go now, and write some incredibly self-pitying poetry that's probably going to suck. 'fated' |